New Jersey Nets Report Card

New Jersey Nets Report Card
Preseason expectations: Oversee positive development from Robin Lopez, and Yi Jianlian. Also continue to see Devin Harris build on last year's all star campaign. Try to win 35 games, one more than last season, and convince LeBron that he should stay on the other side of the Hudson while they still are in New Jersey that is.

Overall based on preseason expectations: F

General: This is a young team rebuilding for the future around one of the rising star guards in the NBA and a solid defensive presence with Brook Lopez. As a team, they were just really bad. So hope that Lopez, Harris, and Yi can all play real well and maybe a win is possible.

Key to their success: This is a team that I couldn't even find good stats for as a team. Brook Lopez averaged almost 19 ppg, 9 boards, and had well over 2 dimes a game. Harris was a 17-7 player and had a decent follow up year after battling injuries early in the year.

Bad Points: All around they were bad as a team, which is why they won only 12 games last year. Worst or Among the Bottom tierin FG%age, ppg, Defensive FG%age, Assists per game, A:TO ratio among others. When you are bad across so many categories, you're gonna lose a lot of games.

LeBron money available: 37.1 million off the books before options. Kris Humphries has a $3.2 million option for next year which I think he'll pick up. Josh Boone has a 3 million qualifying offer which I don't see getting picked up; Dooling has a $3.8 million option, and Chris Douglas-Roberts has another $850K. I could see the Nets go either way with the latter guys here.

How far can NJ go: Their season is over when the lost 18 in a row to start the year. They can hope that the Prudential Center gives them more luck however and maybe with some haggling by their majority owner Mikhail Prokhorov and the more recognizable minority owner, Shawn Carter, who could have enough leverage to get LeBron in NYC. Okay, KONJ would say it's Newark, but to me, Newark is just another large city in the NYC metro area..

I thought the nets would win AT LEAST 35. Devin harris was a beast last year, Brook lopez was getting much better, Yi showed thme that he COULD play, they traded for a defensive SG and a guy how could hit 3's in Lee, they drafted T. Williams who imo was a great pick... then it all fell apart.

So yeah. F is good.

They were among the top teams in the league at FT shooting. That's the only positive statistic I could find

and it pretty much is just a large city in the Metro Area. I'll probably own season tickets for next year too. They'll have a better crowd in Newark than the IZod Center which is always dead

I give the Nets a "G-"

Giving them an F grade would mean that they were actually playing.

I have yet to find evidence of them playing a game this season. If you look at all the footage of the Nets this year, you can tell it was taken from previous NJ seasons.

Devin Harris was in France. Yi was in China. Brook Lopez donned a wig and would sometimes play for the Suns and give Robin the night off. Footage of Kris Humphries, Courtney Lee and Terrence Williams were done in a green-screen room in Santa Monica, Ca. Josh Boone was last seen with Chris Douglas-Roberts in June of 2009 rolling the world's biggest blunt and sailing off of the tip of Florida and has not been seen since.

AS for the rest of the New Jersey Nets. They are all figments of our collective imaginations.

Even Trenton Hassell damn I could have sworn he existed. Are you sure he's a figment of my imagination? I could have sworn he was in Minnesota or was I hallucinating hahaha I've gone nuts you mean to tell me there isn't a Trenton Hassell in the NBA? This is totally off-putting gotta go sell my Trenton Hassell jersey now.

TonyEM: It's Giggles wrote:

Even Trenton Hassell damn I could have sworn he existed. Are you sure he's a figment of my imagination? I could have sworn he was in Minnesota or was I hallucinating hahaha I've gone nuts you mean to tell me there isn't a Trenton Hassell in the NBA? This is totally off-putting gotta go sell my Trenton Hassell jersey now.

Nah.. Trenton Hassell is real. He been hanging out at my place for the past couple of months... freeloader. At least he cleans up after himself. Unlike Bobby Simmons...

"What the hell Bobby! I told you to take your big ass feet off my coffee table!!!"

Once Williams got a good 40 minutes he recorded a triple double
and i believe (correct me if im wrong) they won that game??

next years... TO DO LIST

1. If they get the first pick... Pick John Wall

2. Trade Harris/Yi for a good Combo-Foward possibly
a Gallinari or a Harrington (Knicks would take it wouldnt they?) who can score points

3. PG. Wall SG. Lee SF. Williams PF. Gallinari C. Lopez
this is what a call a bulding to be champions in the future team
fo shooo.

4. Sign as much good bench players as they can
fuck off Boone who is just... terrible
and leave players like CDR and Dooling on the bench

5. New Coach? Kiki was doing aiight
but i would put this team into a run-and-gun team
and focus on defense (take lee and lopez)

6. Change everything about their old image
arent they becoming the Brooklyn Nets next year
or are they still gonna be the NJ Nets...
i would try my hardest to forget this past season...

and my god please Change the JERSEYY
new colours (like their old blue and red jerseys)



they SHOULD make the playoffs atleast
and get ready for the 2011-12 season
as the BRKLYN NETS

recipe for success

I give them "Z-"

That's their grade

Guys, of the teams with an F, there is no other team that deserves it more than the Washington Lose-ards.